First off, let me promise to you that this is the last post I'll write about AI in 2025. I've got a longer-term AI-related project on the go, but the outcome of that, if indeed there is any kind of outcome, won't be known until May next year. So, honestly, this is the last post on AI for a good while, which is good because, after all...
With those wise words ringing in our collective ear, cast your mind back to last month when I wrote about Suno, the scary AI music generation platform. And for latecomers, that's not an app for generating scary music, minor keys and Psycho-strings, no, no - Suno is scary because of how quickly and easily it generates anodyne, MOR pap, the sort that fills supermarkets aisles and hold-please phone lines and mid-afternoon commercial radio stations and song contests and more. It's a technological software marvel, no doubt about that, but it's also somewhat worrying, to say the least.
The "success" of my little Sunovision Song Contest last month did make me wonder though. Could Suno create a good song? What if it was fed decent lyrics, rather than merely prompted with a theme to write its own? And what if the music prompt was specifically targeted, with a predetermined end-result in mind?
You can already tell where I'm heading with this, can't you?
A quick copy and paste supplied the lyrics to one of my favourite songs, by one of my favourite bands. I added prompt keywords to Suno for the music - "british accent, male vocal, mod, revival, new wave, beatles-inspired bassline, strong beats, power pop, open chords, electric guitar, bass, drums, weller, foxton, buckler" - and clicked the ironically labelled "Create" button, and this... there's no other word for it, this abomination is what it came up with. Ladies and gentlemen, with profound apologies, I present Thin As Thieves by The Conserve. Give it until the first chorus, at least.
I think we can all agree that is just appallingly, abysmally awful - a festering turd of a pseudo-song. Unadulterated, unmitigated crap, and you are, of course, most welcome to hate me for inflicting it on you. Okay, you might justifiably question my prompting skills, but that's not the real problem here, is it? Either way, I won't do it again.
To redeem myself, here's the untouchable source material, from 1979's almost-a-concept-album Setting Sons - this is a proper song, and a damn good one at that. Think of it as an aural sorbet, after the travesty above. AI is undoubtedly getting more sophisticated at an alarming rate but for now, at least, there's no substitute for fire and skill.
And some final thoughts from a long-time fan of this very blog:
The Conserve? What a shame Marmalade had already been taken as a name
ReplyDeleteMaybe is should have been Marmite. After all, that divides opinion like AI.
DeleteI'm sorry, but you know my feelings! Even playing with it feels like I'm feeding it some crumbs, on which it will gradually grow bigger.
ReplyDeleteSo instead.... https://www.creativerightsinai.co.uk/new-page
A clickable version of C's important link: https://www.creativerightsinai.co.uk/new-page
DeleteThank you! A read of the 'Principles' page on their site is very informative and worthwhile if you haven't already looked at it. Of course I just got the standard reply from my MP but if enough of us lobby them....
DeleteWorth a try, right?
DeleteFucking hell- that song is awful. I only lasted a few seconds.
ReplyDeleteIsn't it just? Teeth-grindingly awful. The least awful bit is the chorus but even that...shudder.
DeleteThat is awful, but it also sounds very much like the sort of crap Radio 2 would play amid the oldies. You'll be glad to know, at least, that discogs doesn't have any other bands listed called The Conserve, so I can't feature this in a Namesakes.
ReplyDeleteIt's an awful band name for an awful song.
DeleteI listened to it till the very end.
ReplyDeleteAwful doesn't come close.
But it sounds like the sort of thing one of the 'talents' on ITV Saturday evening shows would perform, and in the blink of an eye, it becomes a viral hit thanks to the endorsement of some wanky influencer.
Well done on making it to the end, not many do. And you're right, of course - it's terrible ... but with the right promo, influencer endorsement and Cowell backing, it could trouble the charts. I can imagine some people with no knowledge of the source material finding the chorus of this so-called song catchy. God help us all.
DeleteI did try to stick with it, Martin, but I had to bail out halfway through. Thanks for going there so that we don't have to, though - a brave sacrifice and a wonderfully articulated post. I hope the experience hasn't left you scarred for life!
ReplyDeleteWhilst I was pulling together a 12"/80s comp for a post at the weekend, I inadvertently discovered that Robin Scott aka M released a single called AI? earlier this month. Whilst it's nowhere near as awful as The Conserve, it's fence-sitting is a far cry from Weller's searing social commentary.
I'll look that up, cheers. And I'm not scarred for life...but I'm definitely bruised!
DeleteWell that there should be our next Eurovision entry, a guaranteed winner!
ReplyDeleteCrap as that was this AI lark still gives me the chills, even to the small extent of the Trump comment video!
I know, mate, and that Trump video was made with a cheap and nasty free online tool - if you pay you can remove the watermark and then it just looks like a video. Forget deepfakes, soon you won't know what's real and what isn't any more. Chilling, it certainly is, and another example of mankind's endless ability to nail its own coffin lid down.
Delete