It's all about meme

Stolen (post title an' all) from Sunset Over Slawit, who in turn stole it from Sunday Stealing...

1. If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

   Buy my book.

2. If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

   God. Only question 2 and I'm already starting to remember why I have quite such an intense dislike for memes like this. I mean, come on - that's a ridiculously hard question, like saying "what's the best film ever?" or "who's your favourite band?" The options are near limitless and every day would result in a different answer! Argh! But today, for now, I'll say Morrissey. Why not?

3. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

   Annapolis. First class?

4. What do you think about most?

   Missed opportunities.

5. You have the opportunity to spend a romantic night with the music celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

   Oh, for Christ's sake! Do I have to answer this? Oh, alright then... I used to have a bit of thing about Louise Wener out of Sleeper.

6. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

   Easy... but not something I'm prepared to reveal here.

7. What's your strangest talent?

   Missing opportunities.

8. What would be a question you'd be afraid to tell the truth on?

   I refer the honourable gentleman to the answer I gave earlier... two questions earlier, to be exact.

9. Ever had a poem or song written about you?

   Of course not. But some feel tailor-made.

10. When is the last time you played the air guitar?

    I don't know but I played real guitar last Friday.

11. Do you have any strange phobias?

    Memephobia. This is therapy.

12. What's your religion?

    Humanist.

13. What is your current desktop picture?

    My partner, Ms Pip.

14. When you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

    This month, raking up sodding leaves.

15. What's the last song you listened to?

    Smithers-Jones by The Jam

16. Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

    See! Bloody memes with their unanswerable questions! Smiths? Jam? Weddoes? Gene? Let's say Gene. Where are they now?

17. What was the last lie you told?

    "I will answer every question in this meme fully and honestly."

18. Do you believe in karma?

    Only as a type of chameleon.

19. What is a saying you say a lot?

    "Yes, I'll rake those leaves up today."

20. What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

    a) I miss opportunities. b) Self-awareness.

21. Who is your celebrity crush?

    Define celebrity - its meaning seems to have been diluted recently.

22. Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word: heart.

    Break.

23. How do you vent your anger?

    With a roar to the heavens when I belt another shot into Row Z.

24. Do you have a collection of anything?

    Music. CDs, tape, vinyl.

25. What is your favorite word?

    Meme (insert string of wink-faced emoticons here, laugh like a loon, clap self on back heartily, etc)