Thursday:
- Queued for ages to get in.
- Put up the tent in scorching sunshine.
- Having seen the weather forecast, drove back home.
- Slept safe and warm in my own bed whilst thunderstorms and torrential rain battered the festival. Yes, I know this is not in the festival spirit, but there really is very little on at the first night of Latitude (except a recording of the always-excellent Now Show that would have been impossible to get into), and I saw no sense in getting pre-drenched for the start of the festival proper on Friday. Yes, I am getting old.
- Amazing Baby : Obelisk Arena. Amazingly ordinary, I have to say. Too small for such a big stage.
- The Temper Trap : Uncut Arena. Really very good Aussie rockers who deserve your ear.
- Watson & Oliver : Cabaret Arena. Intriguing sketch-based double-act. Their Boris Becker/Steffi Graf skit was properly funny.
- Phil Nichol : Comedy Arena. One trick pony? Only his "Only Gay Eskimo" song raised proper laughs.
- Tim Vine : Comedy Arena. Tried very hard to be Tommy Cooper. Failed. Not to everyone's taste, by any means.
- Ladyhawke : Obelisk Arena. Made a nice noise and impressed lots of people (like me) who were mainly there waiting for the Pretenders to come on.
- Pretenders: Obelisk Arena. After a couple of newer songs, quickly opted for a crowd-pleasing greatest hits set, with the incredible Chrissie Hynde acknowledging that we didn't "want to hear that shit." Amazing voice too. Best of all, for me at least, they even played "Talk Of The Town", which was the first proper record I ever bought for myself.
- We Have Band : Lake Stage. Great name. Band... not so great. We Have Noise would have been more accurate.
- Little Boots : Sunrise Arena. Why, oh why, was this pop pixie squirrelled away on such a small stage? She would have been better served by Amazing Baby's slot on the main stage earlier in the day. Excellent. All Kylie comparisons seemingly justified.
- Pet Shop Boys : Obelisk Arena. Despite not being the biggest fan, I was impressed by their show. Lights, dancers, visuals, theatre... and again, lots of their bigger hits to wow the crowd. "Jealousy" was the highpoint for me, in no small part thanks to the dramatic choreography of a couple of dancers, acting out the turbulence of a couple's relationship. "West End Girls" closed the set, and reminded me how much I love that song.
- Tim Turnbull : Poetry Arena. A great voice for delivering poems, and rhyming couplets are always seductive.
- Hannah Walker : Poetry Arena. A late replacement for the advertised act, Hannah did well.
- Marnie Stern : Uncut Arena. Apparently voted the world's greatest female guitar. Well she can play a bit but she can't sing. Shouty. Repetitive. Boring. Screechy. Loud. Avoid at all costs.
- St Vincent: Uncut Arena. Better but still nothing to write home about.
- Pick of the Pleasance - 6.0: How Heap And Pebble Took On The World And Won : Theatre Arena. A play that started out very humorously, but the environmental message wasn't always clear, plus it went on too long.
- Mika : Uncut Arena. After a trio of disappointing acts, Mika restored Saturday. With a stripped-down band and playing acoustically, Mika really got the crowd going and put on a great show, all sparkling ticker tape and giant, Prisoner-esque balloons. Again, might have been better on the main stage, though the claustrophobia of a rammed Uncut Arena probably helped pump the atmosphere up still further.
- Vivenne Westwood : Literary Arena. Expecting this to be a bit bonkers, I wasn't disappointed. Not sure she knew what she, or her supporting cast, were doing. Some kind of grand unifying theory of life, Westwood-style. Odd.
- Doves : Obelisk Arena. Brilliant. Great tunes, good interaction with the crowd, "Pounding", "Kingdom Of Rust", "Black And White Town" and, best of all for this boy, all topped off with "There Goes The Fear". Excellent.
- Newton Faulkner : Uncut Arena. Just him and his guitar. Newton wins the non-existent award for best crowd participation. The good vibes were radiating out of the Uncut tent by the end of his set.
- Danny Wallace : Literary Arena. I couldn't face watching a 60-year old Grace Jones in a thong (it happened, really). Much better to watch the likeable and funny Danny read from his latest book, and talk about what it is to "grow up" (i.e. turn 30 and own display cushions).
- Robin Ince's Book Club - Crazed Preachers & Weird Religious Nutjobs : Literary Arena. The beauty of this is that religious fundamentalists surrendipitously write all the material for you. Robin Ince: hardest working man at Latitude.
- Marcus Brigstocke presents The Early Edition : Comedy Arena. Fun spin-off version of Marcus's Late Edition radio show. Lots of people left before the end though, because they all wanted to see...
- Thom Yorke : Obelisk Arena. For me, the highlight of the whole festival. Advertised as a solo slot, it really was just that - no backing band at all, Thom did it all himself, occasionally looping a guitar or bass part and then playing over it. Beautiful, fragile songs, including plenty of Radiohead material, delivered to an appreciative, almost reverential crowd, it was the perfect performance for noon on Sunday. If they came out alright (and if I get time), I'll post photos and a video clip of Thom on here in the week ahead.
- Frank Skinner in conversation with Sylvia Patterson : Literary Arena. You've got to love Frank Skinner. He's funny, genuinely quick-witted and his autobiography is as searingly honest as any you'll ever read. Met him afterwards and had a brief chat - a good guy. Let's start a campaign to bring back his chat show!
- Brendon Burns : Comedy Arena. A bit strong for some tastes but very funny nonetheless. Amongst all the comedy, made some surprisingly subtle and well-observed points about racism too. And roasted Michael Barrymore. No, not in that way, you perv.
- Molly Nyman & Harry Escott and the Samphire Band: Film & Music Arena. Caught just a little bit of this lovely orchestral work. That's the beauty of Latitude - you can go from the in-your-face comedy of Burns to sublime classical music by taking a few short steps from one tent to another.
- BBC Poetry Season short film : Film & Music Arena. Okay, I was killing time a bit but the BBC's poetry season is worthy of support, so no harm done.
- Robin Ince's Book Club - Love Sunday : Literary Arena. An afternoon of Mills & Boon, and an example of bad literary sex courtesy of a reading from one of Alan Titchmarsh's books.
- Afternoon Tea with Stuart Maconie and guests Jonathan Coe and Mark Billingham : Literary Arena. I missed out on the free biscuits, but this was an interesting discussion on what represents, and is represented by, Middle England.
- 9 Bach : Lake Stage. A late, and therefore unnoted, addition to the programme. 9 Bach are a Welsh band whose music can best be described as haunting, ethereal and, er, Welsh. Alright though.
- Tom Stade : Comedy Arena. Started very slowly, his brash comedy struggling to win over a crowd largely just waiting for Jo Brand to come on. He got there in the end though.
- Jo Brand : Comedy Arena. Refreshing in that Jo's comedy doesn't really target anybody - it's not at anyone's expense (except, perhaps, for her husband and herself). A real crowd pleaser, as evidenced by the fact that this was the most squashed tent I was in all festival.
- St Etienne : Uncut Arena. Any chance to hear the glorious Sarah Cracknell cannot be missed. Also, the sight of Fox Base Alpha placards in the crowd made me reminisce (for which, read "feel my age").
- Editors : Obelisk Arena. Musically excellent, with the front of the crowd going crazy and the 60-something directly in front of me keeping time by beating along with the snare drum on his wife's bottom. Such a shame the band couldn't find it in themselves to interact with the crowd though.
- Magazine : Uncut Arena. Having seen Buzzcocks here last year, it was pleasing to mop up Howard Devoto's other band this time around.
- Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds : Obelisk Arena. I try and try to get into Nick Cave, I really do. I even took lovely hot chips along in an attempt to get me in a better mood for this. But all to no avail - apart from "Dig, Lazarus, Dig!", this just doesn't work for me (sorry). I gave up after half an hour and went to watch...
- Nathan Filer : Poetry Arena. One of an increasing number of poets at Latitude (and in general, actually) who clearly think they are stand-up comedians. Listen carefully - you're not. Accept it.
- Ross Sutherland : Poetry Arena. Duetted "Silent Pylons" with that poem's author, Chris Hicks, but why, oh why, can't Ross pull his trousers up properly? He's 28, for god's sake, not 16.
- Lenny Beige & The Fickle Hand Of Fate : Cabaret Arena. What better way to end the festival than with a cabaret recap of the musical highlights of the weekend? Lenny and his band performed tracks by the Pet Shop Boys, Squeeze, Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds, and more. Good fun and a positive note on which to head back to the tent.
And what was the epiphany, you ask? That sources of happiness and unhappiness can be exactly the same thing. Don't ask.
